Marketing training manual

[felix 0]

The buzzword in today's business world is MARKETING. However, people often

ask for a simple explanation of what "Marketing" actually is! Well, here it

is:

 

You're a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and

say, "I'm fantastic in bed" -

 

That's Direct Marketing.

 

You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy. One of your

friends goes up to him and pointing at you says, "She's fantastic in bed" -

 

That's Advertising.

 

You see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and get his telephone

number. The next day you call and say, "Hi, I'm fantastic in bed" -

 

That's Telemarketing.

 

You see a guy at a party, you straighten your dress. You walk up to him and

pour him a drink. You say, "May I", and reach up to straighten his tie,

brushing your breast lightly against his arm and then say, "By the way, I'm

fantastic in bed" -

 

That's Public Relations.

 

You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He walks up to you and says, I hear

you're fantastic in bed" -

 

That's Brand Recognition.

 

You're at a party and see a handsome guy. He fancies you, but you talk him

into going home with your friend -

 

That's a Sales Rep.

 

Your friend can't satisfy him so he calls you -

 

That's Tech Support.

 

You're on your way to a party when you realise that there could be handsome

men in all these houses you're passing. So you stand in the centre of the

street and shout at the top of your lungs, "I'm fantastic in bed" -

 

That's Junk Mail.

 

You are at a party, a well-built man walks up to you and gropes your breast

and grabs your ass ...

 

That's Arnold Schwarzenegger!

 

YOU LIKE IT, BUT 20 YEARS LATER YOUR ATTORNEY DECIDES YOU WERE OFFENDED.

 

THAT'S AMERICA

[Brian Frank 0]

 

Good one...just now saw this.